“My…heart…my…liver…tell…my family…it was worth it.”
~Consumers of fried alcohol
Ever since Reese’s came up with the groundbreaking decision that sweet things taste good with peanut butter, it’s been a commonly accepted practice in American culture to ignore “common sense” or “that pain in your chest” and combine things that are delicious, logic be damned. Do you like beer, and meat? Meatbeer! Do you like doughnuts, and hamburgers? Get that man a fucking Luther Burger! Do you like Taco Bell (read as: are currently drunk and on the way home from the bars) and Doritos? How the fuck have you not had a Doritos Locos Taco yet, that’s literally the sole reason why Taco Bell is still a viable fast food establishment! What is wrong with you!?
The point being, when America loves two things, like, say, a Labrador Retriever and a Poodle, we like to force them together through unholy acts and hope that we end up with a pleasing end result, like a Labradoodle. Well, guess what. We love fried food. And we love booze. We think you can guess where this is going.
We’re going to get a Labradoodle drunk and then feed it a shitload of fried food.
Wait, what’s that? Oh, no, we’re just going to tell you about people who deep fry alcohol. Yeah, that sounds pretty good, let’s do that.
7 Boozy Deep-Fried Alcohol Treats
(photo courtesy of thrillist)
Posted in America's Culinary Treats, Fried Foods
Tagged Alcohol, America, Booze, Bourbon, Bulleit, Champagne, Deep-Fried, Deep-Fried Tequila, Frid Foods, Fried Beer, fried booze, fried bourbon, fried coke, Fried Food, fried jack and coke, fried tequila, fried wine, jack and coke, Jack Daniels, Jim Beam, Luther Burger, margarita, Meatbeer, Taco Bell, tequila, texas state fair, Whiskey
“Holy boozy mother of fried mercy.”
~AFFotD Food Critic, John Goodman
You see what that is up there? Chicken fried bacon. We just figured we should rip that band-aid off right away, and let your brain adjust to that. You know how, when you’re Scuba Diving, you’re not supposed to surface too quickly? Well looking at this picture puts you all in danger of coming down with the Fried Food Bends. It’s too much too fast. You’re going to end up as an early Radiohead album. Only, you know, fatter.
AFFotD has always been on the vangard of introducing you to the most terrifying foods that carnivals and deep friers have to offer. It’s our duty to inform you of the most efficient ways to get calories in your body faster than Kirstie Alley falling into a vat of butter. How else are we supposed to earn our blood money from Wendy’s if we don’t create a dozen new fat people everyday? That’s right, we couldn’t, and their hired goons would ensure that our entrails were never found. And we happen to like our entrails very much. Which is why we’re here to team up with our ally, transfats, and present to you…
(Even More of) America’s Most Ridiculous Fried Foods