Category Archives: Goofiest Presidential Photos

One one-stop-shop for finding the goofiest pictures of our presidents, as well as determining our ugliest Vice Presidents

America’s Goofiest Pictures of American Presidents (Part Two: 1861-1933)

“No, but seriously, you’re not gonna put any goofy pictures of me, right?”

~George W. Bush

As we discussed in yesterday’s fun fact, anyone can have a bad picture taken of them.  And the more pictures taken of you, the better the chance that you’ll come off looking less than flattering.  And who gets more pictures taken of them than anyone?  Actors and models.  Oh right, well yeah, but apart from that?  POTUS, motherfuckers.  Here’s our continuing list of goofy Presidential photos, from Herbert Hoover to Abe Lincoln.

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America’s Goofiest Pictures of American Presidents (Part One: 1933-Present)

Heh, you ain’t gonna find any of me, right?”

~George W. Bush

America is great at whatever they put their mind to, ranging from Lady’s Soccer to anything that isn’t Men’s Soccer.  But even we can’t keep an appearance of perfection at all times.  If there were Americans who, say, looked great every moment of every day, there’d be no reason to Photoshop away the Bulimia-related liver splotches on our most attractive models.  No matter who you’re choosing to idealize, you’re going to be able to find photographic evidence of some imperfection (cough Megan Fox has toe thumbs cough).

Nowhere is that more evident than with our nation’s leaders.  For as long as President’s have been being photographed, presidents have been photographed looking downright goofy or ridiculous at times.  Here is a rundown of the goofy photos of each American President.

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America’s Ugliest Vice-Presidents Part 2: #5-1


~#1 on the list of Ugliest Vice-Presidents

As we saw in yesterday’s AFFotD, there are a surprisnig amount of goofy looking Vice-Presidents.  and we’ve got nothing better to do than to keep on counting down.  So here, for your viewing pleasure (and we use that term lightly) are the five ugliest Vice-Presidents of American History.

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America’s Ugliest Vice-Presidents Part 1: #10-6

“Well, uh, that Biden fella is goofy looking and, uh, I believe we should make him the Vice President.”

~President Barack Obama

American Presidents run the gauntlet from “Ugly as sin” to “Your wife would bone him, let’s be honest” as far as physical attractiveness goes.  But, to be President of the world’s greatest nation that only gets better when you remove the letter “e” from its name, you have to have a pretty large, healthy ego.  So, for most Amrrican Presidents, there have been terrifying looking monster serving as their Vice-President.  The more you think about it, the more sense it makes- much like a Bride giving her Maids of Honor ugly dresses to wear, the President wants the Vice-President to be there to make them look good.  As much as her politics, rhetoric, and speeches were incredibly divisive and damaging to John McCain’s 2008 presidential campaign, what really doomed him from the start was that he decided to choose a running mate who makes you feel sort of funny when you see how she looks in a bikini with a gun.  Meanwhile, an old man and a MILF were running against a young man and the puppet from Jeff Dunham’s stand up ventriloquist bits.

Young man with a puppet running mate win every time.

It’s American to be an ugly Vice-President, and honestly, there are so few instances of non-monster-like vice presidents that those that don’t look like a child of Mothra end up having an easy ticket into the White House.  Plus, we’re pretty sure that the only reason Teddy Roosevelt was a Vice-President before becoming President was that he threatened to shoot McKinley if he wasn’t made VP before pointing at his nose and saying, “That’s called foreshadowing, asshole.”

So as the representatives of the pulse of this fine nation, AFFotD is primed to run down a list of the 10 ugliest American Vice-Presidents.  Because even if they achieved more power than we ever can hope to come close to, we can take solace in the fact that no one remembers their names, and they were goofy looking.  Like, really goofy looking.

[editor’s note- though it’s an easy target most people can recognize, we are not putting Dick Cheney on this list, mainly because our research staff found a picture from his High School Yearbook, and the majority of our female staffers said, “Holy shit, I’d actually bang that guy.”]

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