A Sicko’s Rundown of Every Show in the Walking Dead Universe

Posted on September 19, 2023 | Leave a comment

“You’re letting me out? .I’m free? I’m FREE? Wait…wh…what is this for? OH GOD WHAT IS THIS FOR!?”

~[Redacted]

It’s been almost a decade since we’ve last heard from [Redacted] so we’ll give you some backstory if you might not recall him. After we sent one of our finest investigative reporters out to eat at a Vegan restaurant, things went a bit sideways. To save his family the shame of doing such a thing as eating a meal in America without meat, we buried his identity, kept him in a locked broom closet, and forced him to review the worst shit imaginable for us.

A 1980s rap video with Dan Aykroyd and Tom Hanks, a Rodney Danger rap video, a rap video about recycling. These were his only moments outside of the stuffy darkness. But it wasn’t all just bad white-person old-school rap. Hell, we even made him write a Buzzfeed article back when Buzzfeed was a thing that people actually read. Haha, holy shit, remember Buzzfeed? Back then ChatGPT was just called “unpaid interns” and the end result was about the same.

But anyway. Long story short, we totally forgot we hadn’t let him out since 2014. Then during one of our holiday parties (we believe it was for the anniversary of the release of Rocky IV) we accidentally bumped into our broom closet, freeing [Redacted] who somehow had stayed alive thanks to a leak in the ceiling and the 30 years of prepper-grade rations we always keep in every single closet in our compound.

So we put him to work.

We asked him what he wanted to write about, as a way of apologizing for his decade of solitude, and he said, “Well I left off on the hit AMC show, The Walking Dead, shortly before my last assignment. The first season was great, the second was a little slow, but it seemed to be gaining steam. How about I write about that.”

Oh [Redacted]. You sweet, cursed soul.

[REDACTED] Reviews the Entire Walking Dead, God Bless Him.

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Let’s Review the Wikipedia Page Describing the 2019 Logan Paul Film, Airplane Mode

Posted on July 7, 2023 | Leave a comment

“Haha, no I think legally it would be a crime if I forced any of you to watch this movie in order to write this review.”

~AFFotD Editor-in-Chief, Johnny Roosevelt, During a Weekly Staff Meeting

We take our role as arbiters of culture very seriously here within the walls of America Fun Fact of the Day. We’ve literally spent 60,000 words talking about Ted Lasso, which increasingly has led to people thinking we’re going dad-core or something, but goddamn it, we still have our finger on the pulse of culture!

So with that, we are going to tell you a movie you have no excuse knowing about. Hell, we have no excuse knowing about it.

This movie was in theaters for exactly one week in a limited release in the year 2019. We honestly do not know if it made a single dollar, as there literally is zero box office information regarding this film. It has a user rating of 1.9 out of 10 on imdb.com, and the only professional review it received basically says, “We, as a society, deserve this.”

We’re not going to review the Logan and Jake Paul “surreal influencer action comedy” that is Airplane Mode. Because that would involve watching that.

Instead, go on a journey with us as we break down the Wikipedia page describing the plot. Trust us…it’s a fucking ride.

We Summarize 2019’s Airplane Mode based off a summary of 2019’s Airplane Mode

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The Definitive Ranking of Every Ted Lasso Character (Season 3)

Posted on June 12, 2023 | 1 comment

“Be Curious. Not Judgmental.”

~Ted Lasso

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Ted Lasso, the little show that could (win 11 Emmys), aired its (theoretically) final episode recently. You know the show. You have at least one friend who is like all of our staff members who will gladly talk to you about it without warning, most likely leading to a long, unwelcome conversation.

It’s the story of a college football coach brought over to England to coach a team owned by a spurned ex-wife who hires him to tank her former husband’s favorite team. 

What ensues is a heartwarming ensemble sports show that also deals with heavy topics like mental health, divorce, and self-harm. It also is, by far, the most popular Apple TV+ intellectual property. It has a devoted fan base, hundreds of accolades, and is so great that even though it was planned to end after the third season, they won’t rule out a spinoff.

We love it.

For the past two years, we’ve done the aggressive work of ranking every. Single. Character. If they had a name? They got an entry! 

We wrote about 61 characters who had a named role in Season 1. By Season 2, that number blew up to 121.

According to the Ted Lasso wiki page, by Season 3 we got up to over 300 characters.

Politely? Fuck that.

We’re changing the rules for this final entry to this series, which might diminish the impact of how different certain characters’ rankings are compared to last year, but no one reading this wants to deal with 20,000 words mostly filled with entries that simply read, “Oh, this is Amy, she was Jamie’s partner in the reality TV series he did at the start of Season 2.”

You don’t want to hear that! You want to see where we ranked Nate now! His journey has been a roller coaster!

So instead of ranking every character who has a line or a name, we’ll start with an honorary “you were on the show good for you” list before ranking characters who have actual impact on the show. This should save you all about 20 extra minutes of reading, so you’re welcome.

Every Ted Lasso Character, Ranked (Season 3)

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Every Comic Actor in the Star Wars Universe

Posted on March 28, 2023 | Leave a comment

“Haha holy shit, this involved a lot more research than I assumed it would need.”

~AffotD Editor-in-Chief, Johnny Roosevelt

star wars logo

Listen, we’re not new the the concept of writing very unnecessary Star Wars articles that require a lot of research that doesn’t have a real audience. Do you, the reader, really care how many Academy Award nominees have been in Star Wars movies? Of course not. But we still wrote 4,500 words on that topic.

Since that article, the Star Wars universe has expanded greatly, after Disney bought the rights for Disney for $4 billion (if you want to get a sense on how much money doesn’t matter, that is 1/10 of the price that it cost to purchase Twitter, a product that has never made money, while the movies made since the acquisition alone has grossed $5.5 billion in the box office).

Anyway, with all the TV shows and new movies that have come out, we’ve noticed something. There are multiple generations that grew up with the dream of being a part of the Star Wars universe. And there seems to be one way to increase your chances to find yourself cast in a galaxy far, far away.

You have to be a comedian.

Or at least a comedic actor. We went through all of the Star Wars properties, and compiled every actor that we’d deem “a comic actor” who has played a character in that universe. Now, the definition of a comic actor is purely subjective, so we likely missed some people who you might believe should be on this list, while including people you might not view as comic. We don’t care, there’s no ranking, we’re just listing people, and 90% of you will (rightfully) just skim through this. And you should! Spoiler alert, this is going to be longgggggg.

Anyway, here are come funny folks who can officially say they have a Wookipedia entry.

Apparently the Easiest Way to Get a Star Wars Role Is to Be a Comedy Actor

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Best Batman Performances, Ranked

Posted on March 17, 2023 | 1 comment

“There is no way anyone is going to be completely happy with this list. In fact many will be livid. Let’s run it.”

~AFFotD Editor-in-Chief Johnny Roosevelt

Let's Talk: Batman to Batman

There’s a new entry to the Batman franchise, which is about as evergreen of a statement that has ever existed. Batman franchises replicate faster than Tribbles. We’d make a “Being a Batman franchise is like being one of Nick Cannon’s children” joke but we are not hacks, dammit. We have standards.

Batman is basically the pop culture equivalent of bunnies. Their parents always die.

The latest installment that we don’t really need from a franchise that has about a 50% success rate in their attempts to revive the caped crusader is a CW show called Gotham Knights, which premiered March 14th of this year. Not only is it very bad, it has so many baffling ideas behind it we can’t wrap our head around it.

While there is a popular video game of the same name, that game essentially has you playing characters like Robin, Nightwing, Red Hood and Batgirl in a world reeling from the death of Batman. Gotham Knights the TV series also starts with the death of Batman, but instead follows a random group of teen thieves and the adopted son of Bruce Wayne. We are of course talking about…Turner Hayes????(????)

What? Yes that’s right, they made up a completely new character, who doesn’t even know Bruce Wayne was Batman until his death. There is no Alfred. There is no Jim Gordon. Harvey Dent, played by Supernatural‘s Mischa Collins, basically should be named Gordon, as his role is “boss cop”, but no. (Collins is arguably the only good thing in the show, to be fair. There is a Robin, but she’s a random high school girl that met Batman once before he started training her, again without his son knowing. She is introduced with the line, “Wait, aren’t you in my Trig class?”

Ughhhh.

It’s basically Riverdale, but Batman. The writing is bad, the acting is wooden, and it likely won’t get a second season.

But it got us thinking. A lot of people have played Batman over the years. So why not create a subjective list that’ll get Batman fans upset? Sweet! Let’s rank the best Batmans!

AFFotD Determines, Definitively, Once and For All, Who Is the Best Batman

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How Did We Do? AFFotD’s 2023 Academy Awards Rundown

Posted on March 14, 2023 | 2 comments

“…Honestly, better than we should have done.”

~AFFotD’s Film Critic Staff

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Last week, we wrote our Academy Award guide for the Best Picture nominees, listing what each film was about, who should win, and who will win. Yes, we saw every nominated Best Picture film (as well as Best Actress, Actor, Supporting Actress, and Supporting Actress films) because we are deeply unwell. 

Then we took a long, long collective nap. We woke up, and the Oscars were airing in two hours. So we rushed together a half-assed rundown where we provided our predictions for the Best Actor and Best Actress categories, and a final one where we rushed through the rest of the categories with very little thought or intention. 

How did we do? Not bad! We were right on 15 of the awards given, and a few of those were ones we indicated were potential winners, and like four of them were in categories we had not seen a single entry too (we may be movie weirdos but we’re not watching all the Short Live Action nominees, come on, are you kidding us?).

So we might as well do a rundown of a historic night at the Academy Awards, and go through where we nailed it, and where we done goofed. 

America Fun Fact of the Day’s 2023 Oscar Rundown

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AFFotD’s 2023 Oscar Guide – All the Other Categories That Aren’t Best Picture or an Acting Category

Posted on March 12, 2023 | 1 comment

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Folks, we’ve had an afternoon. Our staff last week sat down and watched all the Oscar nominated films for the major categories. We then sat down and wrote 3,000 words about all of the Best Picture nominees, and who we think could and would win.

Then we had a party and something went wrong with our keg, or our inhibitions, because we woke up and it was just hours before the Academy Awards were set to begin. As of starting this, they will start in 70 minutes. We were able to get Best Actor/Supporting Actor and Best Actress/Supporting Actress predictions in under the wire, but we regret to inform you, there is no longer time for us to be thoughtful or even explain our guesses. Here are the rest of the categories. We’ll let you know if we have any particular thoughts, or haven’t seen a movie nominated.

The Oscars Start in an Hour. We’re Not Even Going to Have Images. Let’s Run Through the Other Awards.

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AFFotD’s 2023 Oscar Guide – Best Actress/Supporting Actress

Posted on March 12, 2023 | 2 comments

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Hey, hi, how are you. We’ve meticulously written a rundown of all the Best Picture of the Oscar nominations, which as we start writing this will be airing in two and a half hours, and we spent the last hour doing a rundown of the male acting categories. So let’s not waste time. WE GOT DEADLINES.

Our Predictions for Best Actress and Supporting Actress for the Oscars Happening in 180 Minutes

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AFFotD’s 2023 Oscar Guide – Best Actor/Supporting Actor

Posted on March 12, 2023 | 3 comments

“Shit, we forgot to put quotes on the last one of these. WAIT THE OSCARS ARE TODAY?”

~AFFotD Editor-in-Chief, Johnny Roosevelt

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We posted our rundown of all the Best Picture nominees to illustrate that we’re masochists who have watched all the Oscar nominees for Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Actress, Best Supporting Actor and Best Supporting Actress. We then were planning on posting our rundown, and predictions, for all the other awards in three additional articles. Then we got lazy (read as, drunk) and forgot.

But the awards are in four hours so we still have time to either come off as Award geniuses, or Award FOOLS. So let’s get started with the male acting awards.

AFFotD Predicts Best Actor and Supporting Actor Right Before The Oscars

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AFFotD’s 2023 Oscar Guide – Best Picture

Posted on March 6, 2023 | 4 comments

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As you no doubt know, the staff here at America Fun Fact of the Day are certified sickos. We also are weirdly obsessed with the Academy Awards. It’s an illness we can’t explain. As a result, our entire staff sat down and watched every single movie nominated for Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Actress, Best Supporting Actor, and Best Supporting Actress, as well as a handful of wildcard nominations.

We don’t necessarily recommend this. We saw about 20 Academy Award nominees, which by a rough estimate means we spent 50 hours watching movies that are trying to be prestigious (also Top Gun and Avatar).

Families were abandoned. Funerals were skipped. Hot Pockets were consumed en masse. But we did all this so that you can hear our arbitrary opinion of each nomination, and our predictions going into Sunday’s ceremony.

So sit back, and probably get ready to be mad at some of our rankings.

AFFotD’s 2023 Oscar Preview – Best Picture

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