“In honor of the sacrifice of our men and women overseas, you don’t have to work on Monday, freeing up Sunday for a drunken barbeque.”
~The Constitution, probably
This Monday is Memorial Day, the national holiday where we remember the men and women who have died while serving in the Armed Forces by taking advantage of a three-day weekend right around the time that the weather starts finally getting warm. There’s beer, family, friends, barbecues, and we think this is the one where you’re allowed to start wearing white as opposed to the one where you should stop wearing white.
So on this particular Memorial Day, we decided to dig through the nation’s history and give you an insight into important events that have happened on Memorial Days of the past during the handful of times where we’ve managed to do something besides spilling light beer on our American flag grilling aprons.
Today in American History: Memorial Days of American History
Posted in America Fun Fact of the Day
Tagged America, Barbecue, Barbeque, Beer, Holidays, Jay Leno, Lincoln Memorial, Memorial Day, Sammy Sosa, solar eclipse, surveyor 1
“The best way to get hired is to be drunk and illiterate.”
The past few years have been a rough time for those seeking employment in America. We know that we at the AFFotD offices sometimes have been guilty of rubbing in our plush jobs in the faces of normal Americans looking for work. While they’re left subsiding on Ramen noodles cooked in whiskey instead of water (admit it, you’re both disgusted by and curious about how that would taste once you heard about it) we’re bragging about our Condor egg omlettes and our totally ironic consumption of Whiskeyed Ramen.
Like this, only it actually can get us drunk
But despite our cushy job, which includes the actual captain’s chair from Star Trek that we take turns sitting in (the chair itself? Not so cushy) we do sympathize with the plight of those Americans currently hunting for jobs. Which is why we’re here to salute the most American resumes from Americans who clearly didn’t give a shit.