Tag Archives: Communism

The Informative American Talks Sex: An Unpleasant and Often Painful Method To Create Future American Soldiers (originally published December 1953)

“But I don’t have to look at any nipples when I’m doing it, right?”

~1950’s sexual partner

While going through our daily, cough, research, we stumbled across this particular image from a 1950’s adventure magazine.  For those of you who said “clicking links is for pansies, I only ended up on this page because I waited too long to click ‘save-as’ from the google images preview page,” we’ll do you the service of explaining the magazine for you.

Yes the image if a man swimming in a sea filled with red snakes, but, there is an additional headline informing men of the 1950’s, “Sex can be FUN!”  Now, our staff usually does not discuss sexual conquest or prowess (laaaadies) because these represent moments of personal intimacy that are best left unspoken by distinguished gentlemen.  Or in our case, we get too drunk afterwards to actually write about it, and by the time we wake up we’ve probably forgotten the most relevant details (position, duration, gender, etc).  But, in spite of everything, we at AFFotD can take a pretty firm stance and say, if you have to read an article to assure you that “Sex can be fun,” you’re doing it wrong.

And apparently we’d be right, because as we were going through the archives of our 1950’s newsletters, we discovered that our predecessors had actually found the exact same article.  And, we say this a little less than proudly, they apparently were doing it wrong back then.

Uh.  That’s all the explanation we really have the stomach to describe right now.  Here, uh, is not one of our finer moments.  We’ll just show you the original article.

The Informative American Talks Sex: An Unpleasant and Often Painful Method To Create Future American Soldiers (originally published December 1953)

Continue reading

Advertisements

The Informative American’s Guide For Women in the Workplace (Originally Published February, 1952)

“Misogyny?  I told you, I’m not gonna eat any Jap food.”

~1950’s Boss

Being a woman working in an office in the 1950’s was like being a man working in an office in the bizarro-world 1950’s.  That is to say, if you were a woman under the age of 30 working in an office setting in the 1950’s, you’d have to deal with more creepy old men licking your face than a bowl of hard candies in a nursing home.  Times change for a reason, and one of the benefits of current America is that there’s a general sense of equality when you work here, unless you have a silly accent.

That’s why, as we were looking through our backlog of 1950s issues of The Informative American, we were shocked to see how far we’ve come in regards to women’s rights in the workplace.  Our female staff members get to take advantage of all the debauchery that their male counterparts do, plus we’re LGBT friendly.  But that’s because it’s 2011, if you’re not supporting equality in the workplace by now, West Virginia called and they want their massive debt back.

But things weren’t always that way, and to bring the point home of how much things have changed over the past 60 years, we’re going to post an Informative American article from the year 1952.  The whiskey was just as strong, but the pomade was stronger, and people were still scared of music made by black people.  So without further ado, it’s time to unleash the time capsule that is…

The Informative American’s Guide For Women in the Workplace (Originally Published February, 1952).

Continue reading

America Fun Fact of the Day 5/28- Saturday Image of the Week

“Worst…fun fact…ever”

~The Comic Book Guy

Comic books do a good job of representing American interests.  Superman hated Kryptonite because he rebelled against the Green movement.  Captain America hated…uh…communists?  Probably?  Because we do too?  Daredevil hated sound because he’s really the lamest Superhero out there.  Easily.  No question.

Anyway, we just wanted to give you this lovely image for your Memorial Day Weekend, to remind you that people who draw comics know that America is pretty great.

Just…just soak that in.  Everything that is said?  By the American caped guy?  Rings true.

Because Americans don’t liked to be ambushed.

Have a great weekend, everybody.