“Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!”
~Santa Claus, probably, right? Maybe?
Today is Christmas Eve, that day where you silently complain about the fact that you had to use a vacation day in order to travel back home for the holidays. For some, it’s an important part of the Christmas tradition, and for others, it’s a day you anxiously power through waiting expectantly for Christmas to finally show up. And for most of us, it’s a day where oh shit you totally forgot to wrap your presents didn’t you, okay well you should get that shit down and chuck it under the tree before someone notices.
Now, a few days ago we told you about the worst Christmas treats out there. There was reindeer poop and fruitcake and oh God figgy pudding why as well as a bunch of other horrific British concoctions and it was pretty much awful. But hey, Christmas is tomorrow, some of you are working a half day or some nonsense like that, so let’s just talk about some Christmas treats that you’d actually want to eat instead. Because America does actually know a thing or twelve about making Christmas delicious.
The Best Holiday Treats of Christmas
Posted in America's Best Foods, America's Holidays
Tagged America, Candy Cane, candy canes, Christmas, Christmas Treats, Christmas tree, Eggnog, Frango, Gingerbread, gingerbread men, Holiday Treats, Holidays, Mallomars, peppermint, peppermint bark, Terry's Chocolate Orange, yule log
“Hey baby, let’s get you out of those not-yet-drunk clothes.”
While the Holidays have past, and we are given a much harder time coming up with excuses to start drinking on a Wednesday at noon (“it’s, uh, the birthday of…uh…Jack…Daniels…”) we can still take a moment to look back fondly on aspects that make the Holidays so warm and inviting. And drunk. And an awesome but mean trick to play on your lactose intolerant friends. Yes, we’re talking about eggnog.
“But AFFotD, why are you talking about eggnog when there’s a picture of George Washington that looks like he’s teaching the Indian boy next to him how to properly give a hand jibber?” you no doubt are asking, and to that we say, hey, nice use of the word “hand jibber” it’s nice to know that hasn’t completely fallen out of style yet. But secondly, we have to tell you something. This article? Is not going to be some mamby pamby eggnog article. Fuck that. No, today we are going to introduce to you…
George Washington’s Eggnog Recipe (Will Getchya Drunk)