“Derp de derp I don’t know what pants are.”
~NFL Replacement Referees
America is founded on the tradition of people getting to be on TV for being worse at life than everyone. It is with that intrepid spirit that the National Football League decided that their current crop of referees were doing too much “officiating” and “ensuring that games don’t break down into melees involving dozens of giant men” for their liking, and they hired the various descendants of Mr. Magoo to help fill in. While the NFL is still negotiating vigorously to reach a compromise on a reasonable price, they’ve still been unable to procure the rights to Yakety Sax so we’ve not yet gotten to see the replacement referees the way Roger Goodell intended.
But as an organization that has made a name for themselves through their tireless commitment to the art of going to work drunk, we here at AFFotD are here to offer our full support to these trailblazers of ineptitude. Because no matter how bad they are at their jobs, Blockbuster managers had to go somewhere after they drove their business into the ground, right? And no matter how culpable Roger Goodell might appear in all of this, if America was founded on the belief that evil, egotistical, megalomaniacal men shouldn’t hold positions of power, there’d be a lot fewer Chinese corpses buried along our railroad lines. And with that, we offer you…
In Defense Of Roger Goodell And The NFL’s Replacement Referees