We’re almost there. Less than a week away from the Academy Awards, and just two articles to go. So we can talk about our diet the last few months watching and writing about all of these films (please do not tell our doctor, we technically are all bourbon pizza-tarians at the moment) (and no, it’s not drinking bourbon AND pizza.) (We can’t get into further details).
We’re back on our bullshit. IT’S OSCAR SEASON! The one time of the year where we actually write articles instead of basically drinking and eating carbs until we nap through half the day telling ourselves we’ll write something that night but like, like, when you’re full of Four Lokos and everything bagels, you know that’s not gonna happen.
Anyway, we’ve continued our frankly unnecessary task of watching every major Oscar nominated picture, and are here for the rundown of our next category. We’ve done Best Picture, Best Actor and Best Actress, but now it’s time for Best Supporting Actor.
We’ve run out of food. Living off of a Costco bulk order of Gushers and all the beef jerky the nearest BP station had in stock. But it’s all worth it to watch every Oscar nominated movie and arbitrarily guess who will win. We’ve already covered the Best Picture award and Best Actor, but now *strip club DJ voice* it’s time for the laydayyyyyyyys. Let’s look at the best Actress nominees for 2026.
Every year, our staff gets a text message from an unknown number. “Assemble” it says. Then the next message says “Ugh, no not like The Avengers, that’s tacky, fuck, um, listen, just come down to the office, there is unlimited booze and a movie projector, we have to watch every major Oscar nominated film and write about them. You will only be paid in whiskey and chicken tenders.”
Of our staff of dozens, the only one who doesn’t heed the call is [Redacted]. Which, fair. He’s been through enough over the last 15 years.
Anyway, we’ve already given you our thoughts on the movies nominated for Best Picture, but we went further by watching all the movies that got nominated for the most important award – what MALE actor did the best job this year?
*screeching noise of seven chairs abruptly being dragged away from our roundtable*
Okay looks like our women staffers are taking a break.
We really messed this up, so this will be a pretty quick run-through of acting performances. Should they win? Will they win? Let’s see! (Honestly you don’t need a FULL rundown…so…we’ll just do as much work until we end up with the major categories)
Another year another rushed Oscar rundown of preditions and thoughts of the Academy Award nominated films from the past year. Again we’re getting it done just under the wire.
But enough about us. Let’s look at the Best Picture nominations for the 2025 Academy Awards.
“Ugh. Jesus. Well at least we’re literally the last website on the internet to write a hot take on Artificial Intelligence”
~AFFotD Editor-in-Chief Johnny Roosevelt
Yes, we used AI to make this image. The prompt was “rich venture capitalist using Artificial Intelligence software to write a bad article –ar 16:9”
It’s been a while since you’ve heard from our staff (our staff holiday party was a booze cruise for Octoberfest that ended up leading to an almost note-for-note Triangle of Sadness situation. Only for us, the rich were okay, and the interns…well we don’t have interns anymore).
Speaking of Academy Award nominated films, friends of the site know we get weird about award season. We gave our predictions for every single major category for the 2023 Oscars (and were surprisingly accurate) and we went through 40 years of cinema to re-distribute Best Picture Oscar winners.
These articles took work. Like, enough work for you to rightfully be concerned about the mental state of our writers. And they received hundreds, maybe even thousands of views, and brought in roughly $3.52 of revenue.
You know who has more than $3.52, a larger staff, and decided to fuck off and do their Oscar preview not with 14,000 words that took 20 hours to create, but with an entirely AI-created article with 15 minutes of edits that is immediately recognizable as being pushed through ChatGPT?