Every year, our staff gets a text message from an unknown number. “Assemble” it says. Then the next message says “Ugh, no not like The Avengers, that’s tacky, fuck, um, listen, just come down to the office, there is unlimited booze and a movie projector, we have to watch every major Oscar nominated film and write about them. You will only be paid in whiskey and chicken tenders.”
Of our staff of dozens, the only one who doesn’t heed the call is [Redacted]. Which, fair. He’s been through enough over the last 15 years.
Anyway, we’ve already given you our thoughts on the movies nominated for Best Picture, but we went further by watching all the movies that got nominated for the most important award – what MALE actor did the best job this year?
*screeching noise of seven chairs abruptly being dragged away from our roundtable*
Okay looks like our women staffers are taking a break.
Anyway, let’s look at the nominees.
Michael B. Jordan – Sinners
What’s the Role?
Jordan plays two criminal identical twins and World War I veterans Elijah “Smoke” and Elias “Stack”. They had worked for organized crime in Chicago for seven years before heading down to Clarksdale, Mississippi, using the money to buy a sawmill, they start a juke joint for the local Black community.
It’s an incredible performance, where Jordan earned his first ever Oscar nomination by playing two completely distinct characters so well you might as well assume he actually had a twin.
Oh and he gets to play a vampire. Sorry, spoilers. But yeah this is also a vampire movie.
Should He Win?
Absolutely. He essentially plays three totally different characters, and Jordan’s long been one of the best, most thoughtful actors of his generation. So absolutely,
Will He Win?
It’s very unlikely, unfortunately. He hasn’t won any of the major awards and he’s in that unfortunate position of being too young to be “due” an Oscar but also has been around long enough not to get the “up-and-coming breakthrough performance” nomination. Plus, it doesn’t help that the film is essentially a horror film (albeit one steeped deeply in smart and thought-provoking messaging about race, music, the South, immigration, and a lot more) and genre films tend to be overlooked at the Oscars (though it’s hard to imagine Ryan Coogler not walking away with at least a Best Screenplay win for the film).
Leonardo DiCaprio – One Battle After Another
What’s the Role?
Leo plays “Ghetto” Pat Calhoun, a.k.a. “Rocketman”a.k.a. Bob Ferguson – a bomb specialist for a far-left revolutionary group who goes off the grid after his partner and the mother of his (assumed) daughter turns in members of his organization to avoid prison time. Seventeen years later, he’s living in a sanctuary city, smoking a lot of weed, and trying to care for his teenage daughter.
Things escalate when his daughter is caught in the crosshairs of a right supremacist military officer who looks kind of like a certain type of asshole.
Should He Win?
Yes and no. He’s great in it, but for a guy with, now, seven Oscar nominations for acting it doesn’t quite rank as a career defining role.
Will He Win?
He miiight pull an upset, but it’s not looking likely. If the winner isn’t an over-eager theater kid who has too many E’s in his name, it’ll go to Leo, but while he’s gotten some big wins, he’s fallen to second place for much of the award season.
Ethan Hawke – Blue Moon
What’s the Role?
You know it’s a Richard Linklater joint when Ethan Hawke shows up. This particular collaboration focuses on Lorenz Hart, the famed lyricist who, with Richard and Rogers, made up Rogers and Hart, who wrote such classic songs as “My Funny Valentine”, “The Lady Is a Tramp” and, obviously, “Blue Moon.”
Outside of the first five minutes, the entire film takes place in a bar called Sardi’s on the night of the premiere of the musical Oklahoma!, which was written by Rogers and his new partner, Hammerstein. Hart is diminutive in stature, but always is the biggest personality in the room. He’s funny, charming, kind of a dick, a wanton romantic, egotistical, jealous, beloved, frustrating, pretty much all the adjectives.
The movie was written based on love letters he sent to his 20 year old female protege (he was 48 when he died after catching pneumonia falling asleep drunk in the rain on the street, this takes place a year prior). We clarify that because there were often whispers regarding his sexuality, which is similarly only whispered in the film.
Anyway, Hawke has the same thinning hair of Hart, and is filmed to be a full ten inches shorter than he is in real life, and is probably responsible for roughly 90% of the dialogue in the entire film.
Should He Win?
In a year like 2010 when Jean Dujardin took home top honors, he’d be a shoe in. This ticks every single box that the Academy Awards like to recognize. Long-time adored veteran actor who has never won transforming himself both physically and performatively? Check. Raw biopic with a slight twist of a famous but somewhat underrated entertainment icon? Check. Grand flowery monologues? Check.
But this is not 2010. As much as this is arguably the best performance we’ve ever seen of Ethan Hawke, who mind you now has five Oscar nominations (two for writing) without a win, there are too many performances getting more applaud. But in a just world, he should.
Will He Win?
According to current betting sites (ugh, sigh, we know) he’s the least favored to win. So it seems pretty unlikely. He hasn’t won any of the top prizes (he’s won a local critics awards here and there, but none of the ones that tend to correlate to Oscar gold). So as amazing as he was in this (and he was amazing, you have to see it just for his performance, and if you want to watch like a 5 foot tall Ethan Hawke just slouching around) he’ll have a good time at the after party, but not with any jewelry as it were.
Timothée Chalamet – Marty Supreme
What’s the Role?
Basically Cocktail, but ping pong. Like, no seriously, it’s ping pong, but Cocktail. If you’ve not seen Cocktail (god we’re saying that word a lot, did we just summon a bottle-spinning Tom Cruise?) it’s, well, most known for Tom Cruise being a bartender doing crazy tricks, but if you’ve not seen it, it also has a large plot point where he knocks up a rich girl, and as she’s pregnant cheats on her with a different more rich girl, and somehow gets the first girl to take him back.
He’s a dick.
That’s Marty Supreme. He’s a self-centered ping pong prodigy who is hellbent on bringing the sport into the American mainstream. He also knocks up his love interest. He also then hooks up with a richer woman (a former actress, played by *checks notes* Gwyneth Paltrow, who is married to his benefactor, played by *checks notes* fuckin’ Mr. Wonderful from Shark Tank!? What the fuck?).
Anyway, it’s a very intense role with a lot of “what are you DOING” character choices (compliment). Like, if The Queen’s Gambit was the sexy chess movie, Marty Supreme was the sexy ping pong movie.
Should He Win?
Like, sure? On its own merits, it’s an Oscar-worthy performance. But we have a hard time rooting for it because Timotheeee is just SO thirsty for it. We’re a year past “Oh I spent years learning how to play guitar and sing like Dylan” and now it’s “oh and also I taught myself ping pong on a professional level, and I will tell all interviewers that I DESERVE AN OSCAR.” It’s ultimate theater kid shit but not in the fun “hanging out at Denny’s after a performance of Mame” way.
He’s just SO thirsty, and isn’t shy about it, which is kind of off putting (though he’s been less over-the-top about it lately). But that doesn’t take away from his performance.
Will He Win?
Probably. He’s the favorite, has won a lot of the major awards, is both “kind of new to the scene” and also “has been nominated enough he might be due” and seems to have momentum going into Oscar night.
By the way, we’re kind of bemused by the fact that if you take all of Timotheeeee’s Oscar nominations, in order, and turn it into a sentence you basically get a Hemmingway short story.
“Call me by your name. A complete unknown – Marty Supreme”
Wagner Moura – The Secret Agent
What’s the Role?
As we discussed in our Best Picture article, this movie is BONKERS. No, we said this before but we must include again this exact line from Wikipedia describing the plot.
Sergio and Arlindo dispose of the human leg in the Capibaribe River, where it suddenly revives and attacks gay men cruising in a public park at night; the story, presumably a newspaper cover-up for the political corruption and violence during the carnival week, creates a public frenzy
But basically, Moura plays a professor in Brazil during a military dictatorship who joins a political resistance movement. It actually has a lot in common with One Battle After Another. Just, you know, with zombie homophobic legs.
Should He Win?
We kind of think no, he’s good but we liked other performances better. That might be biased due to a language barrier, but it’s a well-performed but very understated performance that is great but feels like it’ll be an instance of him winning because he’s a new face (to American audiences) in a critically lauded movie. Think Roberto Benigni, but not like, that Roberto Benigni.
Will He Win?
He might! He won some major awards, including the Golden Globes, and the Academy has been trying to bring in more international films into the award season, so he has a chance. But if we had to guess, we’d say it’ll go to TImotheeeeeeeeeee. However, this is a possible upset situation.
And those are your Best Actor nominations! We are sickos, so look forward to articles about all the other major awards, and a final post with all the technical award predictions!
America Fun Fact of the Day 