“Shit shit shit, guys, it’s Teddy Roosevelt. We’re fucked.”
While America has produced its fair share of mutant supermen, only one of the nation’s past presidents was actually allergic to electricity, due to the metallic nature of his testicles. A man who once cut another man in half by blinking at him. A man who didn’t like Spaghetti because it was “Too Italian”, so he only subsided on hamburgers and his enemies’ fears. That man of course, is Theodore Roosevelt.
“Hi. Do NOT fuck with me”